
Guo
Sink or Swim
Someone else is in the room, but who?
She hears the sound of talking and laughing, but her father told her not to go downstairs. She looks at many sparkling, cute toys on her bed and decides to stay. The laughter grows louder. Toys are so pretty. She looks out of the window. The lake shines like jewels.
Can you win the game?
Of course.
"How difficult could it be?", she says. She learns to swim very early. But the game is not important. It is only important to see her father nodding and smiling at her. Who was he smiling at that day?
The water is so cold, and she doesn't like the faint fishy smell. She flounders around in the water. Exhausted, vision blurs. She tries to look back. He looks at her. What is there behind him, a lion? Standing next to him, like his pet, motionless.
Don't try to please him! Father is mine! But she can't speak in the water. She sees the lion staring at her fiercely.
Pain, cramps, cold water, suffocation. She finally cries and begs him for mercy, saying that she is wrong. She desperately bites his hand that controls her, but it doesn't move. He is too strong. Can she even be able to defeat him for the rest of her life?
But her love surpasses him.
As she stays in the tub, she thinks that she will never be able to swim across that lake.
Amusement parks, roller coasters. Crazy and happy. So what? She watches it expressionlessly on the TV, then switches to another TV show that is playing, "Father knows best".
She flips through the books. Years pass, and she is still flipping through those books. Everything in the book about human nature, human existence, the establishment of a family, the meaning of marriage, and social rules fails to teach her how to make her father come back to the lake and watch her swim into the distance again.
He comes back, but with her. Another girl, another childhood. Same naive question, same game. The lake water still shines like gems. She stands by and looks at them, thinking to herself that she will never be able to swim across that lake.